Thursday, March 17, 2011

All Sicky and Yuck

Ok, so it's not that bad.

I never get sick. Well, hardly ever. Ok...not very often at least. I have the immune system of a really hardy house plant and typically enjoy the benefits of robust health. But then, every once in a blue moon (mmm...Blue Moon), disaster strikes and I am suddenly rendered absolutely useless.

With the exception of the ability to complain, of course.

I'm a bit sicky today, or as my mom would say, "Feeling punky." I never really understood how punky equated to illness. Should I dye my hair purple and wear black lipstick to truly express my physiological state? I'm not above that. Sickness destroys me, it annihilates me. I disolve into infancy and can do nothing but mope around and breathe heavily, sometimes changing position on the couch to prevent bedsores. Sometimes not. I drink indeterminate volumes of Diet Coke to soothe my aching throat and read a more readily determinate, but far larger, number of pages of Harry Potter. 

Ok, I'd be doing that anyway.

But it feels more indulgent to say I'm wasting my day reading a childrens book while depleting our stock of Diet Coke due to general malaise. 

Oh, and I don't like taking medicine. At all. It's like admitting defeat. I will protest the consumption of medicinal goods until I'm so weak with fatigue that my in-home health care provider (i.e. anyone I live with who is developing facial ticks and rapid sweats each time I blow my nose loudly with intermittent heavy sighing. Hi Husband!) needs only to slip a pill into my gaping and unmoving mouth, pour in a measure of water and hold my nose and mouth shut until I'm forced to swallow. So, if I have taken medicine on my own volition (and sometimes you actually have to keep tabs of the number of pills to make sure I'm not lying...also not above that), like today, then it's the real deal. Something's up. In fact, I'll likely take some MORE medicine when I'm done writing this. A very bad sign, indeed. Sore throat, headache, congestion- begone!

Good thing this only happens a few times a year- if that. I fear any more frequent and I would be friendless and alone. I can hardly stand me when I'm sick.


5 comments:

Ange said...

Holy moly, it sounds like EVERYONE is getting sick this week.

I had the fuzzy head, sore throatness going on yesterday. Apparently 2 hot toddies after work and 9 hours of sleep can sure that.

Instead of medicine, I say you need to consume a hot toddy. Stat!

Allie said...

Ooooh, yes a hot toddy. Yes, I want that. Maybe I'll wait an hour for Husband to come home and moan pittifully for a bit until he makes me one. I can't be bothered. :) Glad you are feeling better!

Tracie said...

Fun, cute posts here! Stopped in to say hi and to co-miserate. I'm not sick but I've got a couple of punky kids - or is it puky?! Sadly both, especially in the van :( Grrrr. With the kids sick, I'm not cooking but I hear you cooked up a tasty healthy dinner for hubby. Some day I'll be supportive like that. I've got a creamy potato cheese broccoli soup that'll knock your socks off! Or even a pumpkin soup one that's pretty darn amazing but I can't seem to eat it anytime but fall. Hope you're feeling better soon!!!

Canis Majoris said...

Wow. Are you a dude?? I thought only guys reacted to being sick like you just described. :)

Hope you get feeling better.

Allie said...

Tracie- I've been following the sicky saga with the kids on facebook. I don't know how you do it, girl! I guess that's being a mom. I'm glad things are getting better. And YUM. Yes please on the soups. Husband would kill me! :) Heh. Might be worth the risk though...

Canis- Yes, I am a dude. With boobs. It's the BEST way to be a dude. Psych! I'm just a wimp.